sad

dont know y...me sgt feel sad...me rasa sgt2 sad......hurm..almost 1 week sdh ,my relation pnuh dgan gaduh jak...huhuhuhu................x syok btul lah....
semlam ada discuss....dia btul2 let smua feel dia kluar...rupanya aku yg melampau..tp...aku rasa dia pun ada salah jugak...
semalam me pertikaikan ttg knpa me rasa dia x slalu mau me involved dlm family dia.....(tp sbnarnya xda bha...dia slalu bwa me jmpa family dia n bersungguh2 mau me knal smuanya)...........dia clkp dia xda niat...cuma yg pertama tu jak dia ckp dia malu...hurm...
knpa perlu malu kan..aku terima dia seadanya....hurm...
its not about status n taraf hdup bha...aku tgk ur family pun sama jua dgan me bha knpa mau c banding2....
dear kalau lah ko tau apa ada d dalam hati aku ni...hurm...
aku pernah jadi perempuan yg sangat materialistik n mata duitan...(sapa2 yg knal me dulu mmg tau)...aku sgt2 penting kan standard..hurmm...tp me penat sdh memilih jnis llki yg ada standard..utk apa jugak...aku blh sara dri aku sdri...aku blh tanggung family aku jua..xda sb utk aku ilih llki yg berstandard...aku sdh penat lalui smua tu.....aku cuma mau satu hubungan yg mmg aku btul2 rasa kan JATUH CINTA DR MULA...bkn sb aku jatuh cinta dgan latar belakang nya...dan bila aku pilih ko..smua org mempersoalkan samada aku btul2 serius atau tdk...jawapannya aku btul2 serius bha...aku mmg mau hidup dgan kau...aku pilih kau...semua erkejut bila aku memilih STUDENT....SO WHAT.........aku mmg mahu kan kau utk masa depan aku..aku tau kau akn berusaha utk jd llki yg blh aku banggakan..itu janji kau sama aku kan....
berbalik dgan family...xda yg perlu d malukan...hurm..cry aku bila ko ckp kawasan perumahan pun sdh besar bezanya pa lg d dalam...SHIT.......
apa ada dgan rumah tu...aku mau rumah yg pnuh dgan ketawa bkn dgan barang2....n aku jumpa happiness tu bila aku ada d dalam rumah kau....kau bg aku semangat kekeluargaan tu...
sdh terlalu lama aku x rasa hangatnya hidup berkeluarga..   :(  
aku heran knpa kamu blh rapat ni bha termasuk dgan ur cuzz...u ask me bout my  cuzz...i will stuck..bcoz i dont know anything bout my cuz...i hav no idea about them..but u all..dlm once a month ur family blh duduk n BBQ 2gether but me?
i havent feel when 1 family blh duduk sma2 smbil ktawa....
tp me...smua tu hilang bila my mum sakit even when my mum x sakit pu n sdh terlampau byak yg d gaduhkan...u malu sb harta n money..........tp sb smua tu lah my family xda kac syg...sb drng kejar smua tu lah family kami hilang sifat kac syg antara satu sama lain..yg ada cuma dendam...n cemburu...
itu yg kau mau jeles kan...AKU YG SEPATUTNYA MALU DGAN KAU....
x guna duduk d VIP lot n naik kereta all the tym kalau xda happiness....hurmmm....kau x tau apa yg aku rasa....aaku cuma mau kasih syg dear..yg lain smua kita serah smaa TUHAN...yg pnting kta sama2 berusaha utk masa depan kta d masa hadapan.....
BAWA AKU MASUK DALAM KEBAHAGIAAN ITU DEAR....

29/04/2011 7.00PM

YIPPI......my sayang balik besok......huhu.....sangat excited........2morow p ambik my sayang...trus direct p rumah nya lah kan...hehehhehehe....jmpa mentua dulu lah kan..aitch...hahahahaha........apa ptt me buy for tommorow ah....hurm..ngam2 dpt gaji pula tu kan sok...haahha....saya sangat suka..blh lah saya bli apa2 utk d rumah mentua saya...x jua saya malu dtg tangan kosong tp jarang pula me dtg dgan dompet kosong kan..hehehehe...so joanna ready lg utk besok ok.....tdur luk rehat2..

MOHD SHARIL EFFANDY

the man come into my life n bring a joy......MOHD SHARIL EFFANDY.....hurm....i love u much so dear...

tq...u really make me realise everything...

perkenalan yang sungguh hebat dan cepat.......january 2011....mac terlalu awal....tp x terlalu awal utk aku tau feeling aku....23/01/2011........

DEAR= Mohd Sharil Effandy

aku selalu ignore ko...aku x pduli ko lngsung.....tp ko x pnah berhenti berusaha utk dapat perhatian aku..hehehhe...wink2...bocor rahsia c dear....u dtg masa me tgah down n want to change my life...when i decide i want be a bad girl..but u come n bring some light....yup..u r my sun....make me warm when i feel so cold n need some1 to hug me....we kenal from FACEBOOK..hahahha....u add me da lama kan tp me x pnah pduli sal u...sb me ada dia tym tu...but mcm yg u slalu ckp u tgu masa yg patut u muncul..n u mmg pilih ryte tym when 1st komen me...so clever...hahahhha...........we started to inbox...n at last u menunjuk kan sesuatu..hahahha...n me akan ingt ur style ask my num fon...

LAMBAT BTUL LINE KAN...MUNGKIN LAJU KALAU GUNA F&F (UTK PENGGUNA DG)...HAHAHAHA...me yg mmg boring pun tnpa byak soal taip my num n send..lpas send bru ingt...adui..senang2 jak aku bg num ku...nyesal...tp tarik nafas lega...hahahhaha....

after a hour...tut tut...mesej bunyi...open n...TEST2.....i know its u...hahahaha...but masa tu...me mac x stabil...so me x brapa layan dia...brapa hari dia mesej aku balas tp sikit2 jak...hahha...ada 1 hari dia kol aku...1st tym dgr suara dia WOWWWW.....hahaahaa...i like it............selepas itu...hubungan smpai rapat...tp x semudah itu kan mau accpt dia..hehehhe.......baru knal pula tu kan..tp me accept jua la dia as my bf...

jauhnya tu k.k dr sdk...dia sgp balik awal dr sepatutnya just utk me saja tp smpai sdk..me ignore dia n x pduli dia lngsung..JUMPA???hurm...me sgah jap jak utk 3 minit jak mgkn...huhuh...1 mggu berlalu gtu jak.....

tp dia ttp sabar.....sabar smpai lah me sdr sedar...dia the best man for me...sb dia SABAR......

huhuhu...yang aku tau skng dia syg aku n aku syg dia......hhuhuhu...

SAYANG: aku syg kau bodoh!!

LOVE CAN BUILD A BRIDGE SAYANG......

I'd gladly walk across the desert
With no shoes upon my feet
To share with you the last bite
Of bread I had to eat
I would swim out to save you
In your sea of broken dreams
When all your hopes are sinkin'
Let me show you what love means

Love can build a bridge
Between your heart and mine
Love can build a bridge
Don't you think it's time?
Don't you think it's time?

I would whisper love so loudly
Every heart could understand
That love and only love
Can join the tribes of man
I would give my heart's desire
So that you might see
The first step is to realize
That it all begins with you and me

When we stand together
It's our finest hour
We can do anything, anything
Keep believin' in the power